Previously on Ladies…

More crunches and less Nestle for you, Mr. Romo.

Now really, how does a quarterback just lose the ball like that? Everything about this picture just confuses me. Was it covered in grease? Cheese fondue? They have that fondue stand at the Pink Taco. Maybe it was chocolate.

Despite the fact that he’s actually played some this season, it completely slipped my mind that Trent Dilfer was still in the league. How old am I? Dilfer was the QB on my 1997 fantasy football team.

Quarterback trivia you can use to win a bar bet: Derek Anderson throws with his right hand, but writes with his left hand.

One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi…

Giant, grown, goofy boy.

Not even sure if they have rainbow trout in the south, but I cannot draw a catfish.

Best part of the 30-yard TD run? The Alan Faneca yelling, “YOU’RE GOOD! GO, GO, GO!” (Would have been cooler if he yelled, “You’re all clear, kid! Now let’s blow this thing and go home.” But I guess it would be hard to think of movie quotes with a 300 pound linebacker in your face looking to squish you.)

Why does Eli look like he’s 12 years old? He was drafted the same year as Ben Roethlisberger and Philip Rivers and yet he looks like he should be starting second-string JV.

Maybe with that disgusted look he can at least find a date to the prom. Assuming he can find the aisle in Duane Reed that stocks Clearasil.

I wouldn’t dare.

And for Holly’s sake, let us not dwell on Peyton’s Week 10 troubles and instead gaze upon on the fine display of military might that is Jeremy Shockey.

Week 10 Results

Texas Gal’s The Real (Colt)McCoy 118.84 Brett Favre 26.14
TheStarterWife 112.02 Ben Roethlisberger 31.02

GordonShumway’s Angelina Ate My Baby 109.98 Drew Brees 16.88
Metschick’s (De)Jesus’ Homies 105.24 Eli Manning 11.74

SA’s Woodson over Manning 105.42 Matt Hasselbeck 19.72
Holly’s JimBobCooterGaveMe6 162.02 Peyton Manning 17.12

Clare’s Speckhosen 104.86 Jon Kitna 13.78
Andrea’s ThreatLevelMidnight 122.08 Tony Romo 24.88

Stand By Your Man Rankings

1. SA
Tom Brady 9-0
Matt Hasselbeck 1-0

2. Texas Gal
Vince Young 2-1
Brett Favre 4-3

3. TheStarterWife
Ben Roethlisberger 5-4
Carson Palmer 0-1

3. Andrea
Marc Bulger 1-2
Tony Romo 4-3

5. GordonShumway
Drew Brees 4-6
Jake Delhomme 0-0

5. Holly
Peyton Manning 3-6
David Carr 0-0
Donovan McNabb 1-0

7. Metschick
Philip Rivers 3-6
Alex Smith 0-0
Eli Manning 0-1

7. Clare
Rex Grossman 0-1
Jon Kitna 3-5
Matt Schaub 0-1

Divisional Team Rankings

Divison 1
2. TheStarterWife 7-3-0 .700 1339.60
3. ThreatLevelMidnight 7-3-0 .700 1459.88
5. Woodson over Manning 5-5-0 .500 1558.36
8. (De)Jesus’ Homies 1-9-0 .100 963.10

Division 2
1. JimBobCooterGaveMe6 7-3-0 .700 1566.96
4. Speckhosen 7-3-0 .700 1361.36
6. The Real (Colt)McCoy 5-5-0 .500 1256.46
7. Angelina Ate My Baby 1-9-0 .100 986.88

Sorry, I don’t think I’ve played with the MS Paint since this post (why is the formatting off on that post, I do not know) and just felt like goofing off last night.

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18 Responses to Stand By Your Man – Fantasy QB Results: Week 10

  1. Pam/Shorty says:

    I read it TSW!

    Derek Anderson picked a bad time to turn back into Derek Anderson.

  2. metschick says:

    How fitting that J-Money finally gets a win the same week her Rams get a win? And how fitting that it be against my sucky ass team.


    (Not that Alex Smith would have been a better option.)

  4. metschick says:

    That’s probably because I don’t remember. I didn’t even set my roster this week.

    Seriously, I look at my fantasy team like once every couple of weeks.

  5. Clare says:

    If you don’t win some sort of Bloggie award for this post, TSW, there is no justice, no God, no Santa Claus, and no extraterrestrials.

  6. metschick says:

    Yeah, let’s talk about the post, and not about my pathetic team.

    LOVED the Brett Favre/trout picture.

  7. Pam/Shorty says:

    there was fantasy football in 1997?

  8. SA says:

    Why does Eli look like he’s 12 years old

    Because he is 12? At least that’s what I like to think.

    And Woo! On my QB’s being 10-0.

  9. thistlewarrior says:

    OMFG! Awesome post TSW. I think I may have hurt myself laughing.

    Pam-yes, but I think that was when you had to do all the stats, scoring, etc. manually w/spreadsheets. It was very cumbersome.

  10. Pam – I typed 1997 last night, but the more I think about it, he might have been my QB in 1998. But yes, fantasy football existed then. (I also might have hung out in a once weekly chatroom for the Sporting News “Caught on the Fly” that year.) Old AND dorky.

    SA – I was hoping you’d maybe get one loss with the Hasselbeck since no one is stopping Brady. Dammit.

  11. Pam/Shorty says:

    Wow, I thought fantasy football was a more recent phenomenon…I was a freshman in high school in 1997, and I wasn’t very into pro sports back then.

  12. ladyandrea says:

    I’m coming for DeJesus’ Homies this week! MUHAHAHA, all tremble at the power of ROMO!

  13. IJustMadeThatUp says:

    More importantly that FF or any of that Shockey nonsense, WTF IS THAT THING ON TONY ROMO’S BELLY?! Is that really a “gut”? Because if it is, I applaud you Mr. Romo. I applaud you for being brash enough to have a bit of a “pooch” and look more normal and human that other, chiseled, “cleared” athletes who make us mere mortals feel puny and self-conscience.

    Hooray for beer bellies and saggy man boobs!

  14. Hey, I just realized Metsy’s playing coy. She did set her roster this week, as Philip Rivers played last week.

    *points at Metsy… points back at own head… taps noggin… hears empty noise… gets confused as why Metschick is looking at her strangely… wanders off to get a coffee.*

    Andrea – I’ll tremble at the thought that Romo should look into some Zelacore or Relicore or whatever ad it is which features the scientific wire-frame body with the belly fat melting away.

  15. metschick says:

    Did I? I’m not being coy, I just forget when I go over there. I’m kinda dumb, because I should just use your Tuesday post as a reminder.

  16. Holly says:

    *alternate uncontrolled sobbing at the battered Colts and hysterical shrieks of mirth at the genius of this post*

  17. SA says:

    TSW-my QBs cannot be stopped. First the Ladies… FF league, then the world!

    And that rainbow trout? Is GENIUS!

  18. Yostal says:

    Did Eli Manning start taking his facial cues from John Krasinski?

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