Snark Is A Loaded Gun

It starts innocently enough. Cruising through Twitter while eating my lunch I see a link to something Kelly Clarkson wrote about Clive Davis, who I […]
Feb 20, 2013 / Add Comment
Sparking Blueberry Non-Alcoholic Mojito
Sparking Blueberry Non-Alcoholic Mojito

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Designated Driver Sparking Blueberry Non-Alcoholic Mojito 

Be a good host and offer something more than soda or water for the designated drivers at your Super Bowl Party. It’s a nice way to show them you appreciate them driving your drunk-ass friends home at the end of the night so they don’t end up sleeping on your sofa or getting arrested somewhere near the intersection of Dogfish and Stone.

(Plus if you really want, you can use it as a mixer for your drinking friends.)

Deep Dish Skillet Pizza
Deep Dish Skillet Pizza

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Deep Dish Skillet Pizza

This doesn’t have the word “Chicago” in the title for a reason, so don’t come at me with how this recipe isn’t like Pizzeria Uno Chicago-based friends. I typically use less cheese than a typical deep dish pie because they’re already heavy and filling enough, and also because I like to let the sausage and tomato sauce really shine through. And as friend of the Football Foodie Thomas Holzerman says, deep dish pizza is more like an Italian pot pie, not so much a pizza, so don’t feel bad about using less cheese if any here.

You will need:

Cajun Seasoned Sausage Rolls
Cajun Seasoned Sausage Rolls

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Cajun Seasoned Sausage Rolls

Sausage rolls are a very British snack that can be quite good, but are often missing the special extra something that would make them, well, not British. By making your own Cajun-style seasoning mix, you heat up (sorry, cannot say “jazz up” and not hate myself in the morning) these savory bites. Not are these incredibly easy to make on game day, but you can prep these ahead of time and freeze anytime between now and Sunday and not miss a beat. (Sorry.)

Blueberry Goat Cheese Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Blueberry Goat Cheese Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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Blueberry Goat Cheese Dip

This dip isn’t for everyone, just us sexy people. It’s tart with just a hint of sweet and spice, best matched with fresh fruit and cookies, this fruit and cheese dip a great palate cleanser on a day full of heavy football foods.

 

Salsa Verde: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Salsa Verde: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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Salsa Verde

Personally, I like a good salsa verde over the usual tomato, onion and jalapeño routine. Roasting tomatillos creates such a beautiful smell in the kitchen and it’s a nice treat if you’re used to just pulling out a jar of whatever salsa happened to be on sale that week at your tailgate.

Roasted Pepper Artichoke Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Roasted Pepper Artichoke Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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A spin on the classic spinach and artichoke dip, roasted red peppers bring a fiery tang while fresh mozzarella makes this dip especially creamy and rich.

 

Garam Masala Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Garam Masala Dip: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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I came up with this dip early last summer when I was looking for a way to get the essence of a chicken tikki masala dip or wrap, but without all the mucking about cooking.  Not so surprisingly, you get a very bright, tart dip of tomatoes, yogurt, garam masala and warm ginger and cayenne. Just lovely with pita or naan chips.

You will need:

Spicy Avocado Hummus: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Spicy Avocado Hummus: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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Spicy Avocado Hummus

Sometimes you want to mix it up from the usual guacamole, or maybe the avocados in your market are a little on the small side this time of year. This is a good way to stretch those green goddess globes and have a good dip. Spicy pepper and cool avocado always go well together.

 

Quesdo Fundido: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!
Quesdo Fundido: SUPER BOWL RECIPE MONTH: DIP SPECTACULAR!

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Queso Fundido 

If possible, try to use Mexican quesadilla cheese with this dip. It melts without becoming stringy and greasy, unlike many other cheeses. Queso fundido goes especially well with warm soft tortillas.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Shrimp Rolls at KSK
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Shrimp Rolls at KSK

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Even though I’m not a huge lobster fan, but I do enjoy a nice lobster roll with a beer and a game and lobster rolls have been on the master list of Football Foodie posting ideas for at least two or three years now. The problem with lobster rolls is even if you love your snacks and you love your friends, unless you live in Maine or Alaska it’s pretty expensive to procure quality lobster for a few pals, much less a dozen hungry football fans. (Maybe if the Patriots were still in the Super Bowl and you and your friends are from New England and really wanted to splurge on lobster rolls so it felt authentic you could justify the cost BUT THEY’RE NOT SO HA HA HA HA YOU CAN HAVE PLEBEIAN SNACKS WITH THE REST OF US.)

Shrimp rolls on the other hand are a great snack that don’t take a lot of effort to make, nor will they break your tailgating budget. Lemon and herbs bring out the best in shrimp (as they do lobster), a bit of crunch from the celery, touch of heat from the cayenne, peppery arugula and buttery bread.

 

 

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Beer Cheese Soup
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Beer Cheese Soup

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Beer Cheese Soup

To say this soup was hit around here is an understatement. I had been experimenting with my beer cheese soup earlier in the year, trying to get a really nice herbal taste using one of my favorite cheeses, derby sage. (In general I love sage, especially with cheddar and mozzarella.) I couldn’t get the taste just right though, and eventually I came to my senses and just added a bunch of sage and thyme to my soup. The results couldn’t have been better, especially when the herbs blend so well with slight heat of the cayenne. This recipe should serve 6-8 people a 2 cup serving. Don’t be surprised if four people eat it all before the end of the first quarter.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Arayes, Quesadilla’s Delicious Middle Eastern Cousin
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Arayes, Quesadilla’s Delicious Middle Eastern Cousin

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You watch enough football, you go to enough bars, at this point you’ve probably had your fill of quesadillas. Too much meat and too much cheese or not enough meat and not enough cheese. Greasy and fried in butter or dry as a bone. We like to think the quesadilla is a pretty safe menu options when we head out with friends to watch the game, more often than not they fall short. You can make quesadillas at home, but they take a fair amount of work and need some serious attention while grilling — is cheese melting, have I burned the tortilla — which isn’t the best combination when dealing with tight windows of time during the playoffs and the Super Bowl.

What if I told you there was a quesadilla-like snack that’s easier to make? Full of beef and lamb, onions and tomatoes, warm spices like cinnamon, sweet paprika and allspice, with hints of cumin, nutmeg and coriander? That you could grill, bake or fry? That you could even prep ahead of time and cook when ready?

Let me introduce you to one of my favorite new football snacks of the 2012-2013 season, arayes.

You’ve probably seen arayes on the menu of your local shawarma and falafel joint, but probably never bothered to order them, too distracted by the giant spits of lamb and beef marinating and the dozens of whole roasted chickens take up entire ovens. You’re missing out, they’re possibly one of the greatest snack foods around.

Super Bowl Recipe Month - Oven Roasted Gnocchi With Rosemary
Super Bowl Recipe Month - Oven Roasted Gnocchi With Rosemary

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Oven Roasted Gnocchi With Rosemary

In the back of one of the fashion magazines I get they had one of those silly, “Let’s ask a bunch of different celebrities a dumb question so they can answer and we can make a montage of answers because we need something for the back page.” (Or maybe they’re all outtakes from interviews. I have no idea how magazine creation works.) Anyway, in this particular magazine they asked everyone’s favorite English chef (behind Gordan Ramsey, Jamie Oliver, Two Fat Ladies and that other guy) Nigella Lawson what her favorite snack was. She replied pan fried gnocchi, which was just gnocchi cooked in a small amount of olive oil until firm when I looked up her recipe online. Nothing else. Bland. City. (Again, English.)

Ficelle - Super Bowl Recipe Month
Ficelle - Super Bowl Recipe Month

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Ficelle

Ficelle is a type of thin sandwich named for a thin baguette-style bread of the same name. (Ficelle means “string” in French if your guests ask.) If you can think of the combination, you can put on a ficelle, but the key to a good ficelle is not going overboard on sandwich filling since the bread is thinner. You want to pick just a few things and use the ingredients sparingly.

What’s great about these sandwiches is that you can mix and match a bunch of different types and then slice them in to smaller portions, giving everyone a chance to sample a variety a different flavors.

Super Bowl Recipe Month - Wilted Spinach and Mozzarella Tortellini Salad
Super Bowl Recipe Month - Wilted Spinach and Mozzarella Tortellini Salad

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Wilted Spinach and Mozzarella Tortellini Salad

Over the past six or seven months I’ve brought this pasta salad to two football gatherings, a baby shower and a picnic, where it has disappeared every time. I usually find pasta salad, well. Hollow. Pasta and herbs. Bah. Nothing very satisfying there. By using tortellini in place of plain old corkscrew pasta, you suddenly get a very hardy side dish.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Pizza Gougeres
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Pizza Gougeres

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Pizza Gougeres

Don’t let this recipe intimidate you. French choux paste — the basis for eclairs, cheese puffs, cream puffs –  is shockingly easy to make at home. By adding herbs, cheese and sun dried tomatoes, you’ve just made one of the fanciest pizzas rolls around.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Stuffed Baguette
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Stuffed Baguette

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Stuffed Baguette

You can almost hear the old Steelers-Cowboys rivalry fire back up with these stuffed baguette slices. Meat, cream cheese (a popular ’70s theme) stuffed into bread was a must at luncheons and parties thirty years ago.

Now, you’ll notice I added sun dried tomatoes to this recipe, the most ’80s of ’80s ingredients. They’re optional, but they really do add a nice bit of flavor to the mix.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Deli Roll Ups
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Deli Roll Ups

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Deli Roll Ups

It doesn’t get much more ’70s than a deli roll up. Meat, seasoned cheese, pickles, we’ve all seen our parents and grandparents make these over the years for parties.

Why I like them for football gatherings is that they’re easy to do the night before game day and because they’re a satisfying snack and a small platter of these will go a long way to feed a large crowd.

Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Classic Macaroni Salad
Super Bowl Recipe Month: Throwback Week - Classic Macaroni Salad

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Classic Macaroni Salad

If you’re making barbecue, grilling or smoking anything for a Super Bowl or a playoff spread, few things compliment meats made over a fire like an old fashioned macaroni salad.  The mustard picks up the smoke, you get a nice bite of crunch from the celery, and the scallions and peppers help cut the creaminess of the pasta salad.

Most macaroni salads call for much more mayonnaise, but I have found a single cup is the right amount to soak into the macaroni noodle without everything turning to an overwhelming gooey mess. If you happen to keep celery seeds around for Bloody Marys, be sure to include them in your dressing. Brightens the whole salad.

White Chicken Chili
White Chicken Chili

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What sets this white chicken chili recipe apart from other chili recipes is taking the extra few minutes to saute and brown the meat and then cooking the onions and jalapenos in the browned chicken bits and fat. You get an added layer of smokiness and flavor which makes for a more flavorful chili than just tossing chicken in the pot to stew with the rest of the ingredients.

Deli Chopped Salad On Croutons
Deli Chopped Salad On Croutons

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Today’s Super Bowl Recipe Month special post includes a salad recipe I especially like for large gatherings, because it’s salad without having to mess with bowls and forks. Full of meat and cheese? Or course, but it’s still salad and on a day of eating chili, grilled brats, dips and chips, a salad is a welcome sight in any form.

 

Giant Cherry Chocolate Chip Skillet Cookie
Giant Cherry Chocolate Chip Skillet Cookie

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During the regular season, I rarely make desserts or sweets for football. Even after nearly ten hours of games, it never seems like dessert time out here in Pacific Time. But during the Super Bowl when you have a few hours extra of just hanging around and socializing, you’re going to want a dessert.

By using dried cherries which typically are very tart in this recipe helps cut through the sweetness of the dough and the chocolate chips. You can use either light brown sugar or dark brown sugar depending on how rich you like your cookies. Feel free to reduce the amount of chocolate chips because I used a heavy-hand with the chocolate when developing this recipe since people tend to like more chocolate than less chocolate, but not everyone likes a lot of chocolate in their cookies. (Weirdos and Seahawks fans would be my guess.)

Salt & Pepper Biscuit Bites
Salt & Pepper Biscuit Bites

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This is an update on a recipe I posted a couple of years ago, Rosemary, Chive and Cheese Biscuit Bites, which is one of my dream items snack items served for free like beer nuts if I were to ever have own sports bar. Over the summer when I was in New York City, I stopped at a bakery that served pepper and Manchego biscotti. I loved the combination and realized this would be a perfect change to the small biscuits I already loved. The result is an addicting snack item which are better for settling a stomach full of beer and soda than chips.

You may be worried that the small dough ball won’t make that many biscuit bites, but this recipe yields about five dozen of these savory little treats. If you’re having a large party, the recipe is easily doubled or even tripled.

Skirt Steak Sandwiches With Caramelized Onions And Gorgonzola Sauce
Skirt Steak Sandwiches With Caramelized Onions And Gorgonzola Sauce

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I love this sandwich. It’s that simple. Meaty skirt steak, rich caramelized onions, salty gorgonzola sauce and peppery arugula on a chewy roll. It’s sandwich made watching football and yelling at the Texans to stop BLOWING WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THEIRS UGH WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU HOUSTON DID YOU NOT GET ENOUGH HUGS IN DECEMBER I DON’T WANT TO CHEER FOR THE COLTS IF YOU LOSE.

You will need:

Warm Lentil Crostini: Football Foodie Coasts Into The Playoffs
Warm Lentil Crostini: Football Foodie Coasts Into The Playoffs

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Personally, I’m looking forward to an easy weekend of football. We’ve been traveling for nearly two weeks now; cross-country flights, 12 hours on the Pennsylvania Turnpike in a snow storm, going to the symphony, tailgating with my fantasy league and a hockey blogger in a Santa beard, cooking for my family, cooking for my in-laws, multiple bar outings with friends which — even as I type this post — have left my stomach and my head spinning. (It’s tough keeping up with Ape’s drinking, but I guess that shouldn’t be surprising. Apes are known for having quality livers.) I had planned on making one last spread of the season, but instead I think I’m to make something easy this Sunday to snack on. Crostini it is.

Tart Cranberry Deviled Eggs: Football Foodie Holiday Snacks at KSK
Tart Cranberry Deviled Eggs: Football Foodie Holiday Snacks at KSK

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I can’t put my finger on the exact date, but sometime during the Great Craft Cocktails and Brown Liquor Resurgence of the past five or six — maybe even seven, we’ve all been drinking so much it’s difficult to remember — years hard-boiled eggs and deviled eggs made a comeback, especially at bars that served craft cocktails and brown liquor. Not deviled eggs like your grandmother serves at Easter under a layer of paprika, but rather wasabi deviled goose eggs, Sriracha-blue cheese deviled eggs, truffle and chive deviled eggs, and petite smoked salmon deviled quail eggs.

Kung Pao Chicken Egg Rolls: Football Foodie Hearty Snacks
Kung Pao Chicken Egg Rolls: Football Foodie Hearty Snacks

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About this time of year, among all the holiday baking, I start to think about what sort of food I want to have during the playoffs and for the bigger bowl games. (Sorry Music City Bowl, you’re not on the list of snack-worthy events.) Hearty snacks that are easy to make and can be made ahead of time if needed. People love Kung Pao chicken and they love egg rolls, and few things are better on game days than a finger food made for some serious munching. (As I have said many times before, I am a nervous eater so crunchy things like egg rolls are perfect for the playoffs.) The heat from the peppers goes with great with beer while the meatiness of the peanuts help round out the egg rolls.

Scacciata – Stromboli’s and Calzone’s Sicilian Cousin: A Football Foodie Full Game Day
Scacciata – Stromboli’s and Calzone’s Sicilian Cousin: A Football Foodie Full Game Day

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Even the most adamant Team Pizza fans needs a break from heavy sauce, meat and cheese during the season, but there is nothing quite like tearing into warm dough with a cold beer while watching football. Enter the scacciata, a Sicilian variation of a calzone. Heavy on the vegetables and lighter on the cheese and meat, the layers of favor in a scacciata offer a more complex bite than just your ordinary pizza. Potatoes add heft, shaved onions and fennel play off each other in a sweet and savory delight, spinach and broccoli add brightness, spicy sausage adds heat and depth, while the provolone and a touch of olive oil meld everything together.You can add whatever vegetables you like to a scacciata; peppers, eggplant, but if they are rather watery be sure to cook them down a bit before baking. Want olives? Add olives. Want your scacciata to be even spicier? Sprinkle on red pepper flakes along with the salt and pepper. Second sausage? Sure, but don’t add more than two or it gets too oily during baking. A little sauce? Yes, fine. Just a few dabs here or there. Add too much and you may as well make a calzone.

Tapatio Lemon Chips, Thanksgiving Leftovers and Pimento Cheese: Football Foodie Shortcuts
Tapatio Lemon Chips, Thanksgiving Leftovers and Pimento Cheese: Football Foodie Shortcuts

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If it’s Friday and this post is going up, it’s safe to assume neither me nor my husband killed anyone during the Thanksgiving feast — thank you Patriots blowout for being there during a stone cold thirty minute silence between us and a family member we’re not talking to! — and we’re ready to be lazy the rest of the holiday weekend, just as soon as we clean out grandma’s garage, battle traffic past the outlets in Camarillo on our way home to Los Angeles, and do all the chores we swore we’d do this weekend since we supposedly have all this extra time on our hands.

It’s enough to make one look forward to Rams-Cardinals.

Savory Mushroom Pithiviers: Football Foodie Thanksgiving
Savory Mushroom Pithiviers: Football Foodie Thanksgiving

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Two sorts of Thanksgiving diners, ones who believe in eating early and having leftovers again later in the day and those who don’t have their celebration until late afternoon or evening. The former means getting up at 5 am to start roasting a turkey, the latter means torturing yourself with cups of nuts as not to spoil the feast. It also means considering going through the early game of Houston-Detroit — and perhaps even Washington-Dallas, depending on your time zone — without having a snack.

Nonsense. You’re going to need game time snacks that can feed a crowd and also not spoil your appetite, and perhaps one that is relatively healthy. Ones that compliment the autumn table. Earthy tastes of mushrooms, herbs and wine, warm butternut squash and sage spiced with cayenne and chili.

Roasted Butternut Squash Sage Dip
Roasted Butternut Squash Sage Dip

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Butternut squash sage dip is a healthy choice on a day that is already filled with calories. Interceptions are especially fatty, so you might want give this recipe test run when Tony Romo (13 INT) faces Brandon Weeden (12 INT) this Sunday.

Chorizo Stuffed Sweet Potato Skins: Football Foodie Fall Heat
Chorizo Stuffed Sweet Potato Skins: Football Foodie Fall Heat

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Like most people, I’m a sucker for a good twice-baked potato or potato skins with bacon, chives and cheese, but sometimes they’re lacking the depth needed for a satisfying snack. Enter the sweet potato, the better-for-you version of a starchy vegetable. While chorizo is not any healthier for you than bacon, it does offer a smoky spiciness missing from most cured pork belly. By mixing the sweet potato with the chorizo before baking, you eliminate the need for cheese as a binding agent, saving just a few more calories so you don’t have to feel bad about taking a third or even fifth piece. (And if you want to be even healthier, soy chorizo is a good option for this snack.)

 Kolokythokeftedes with Lemon Dill Greek Yogurt Dip: Football Foodie Fritters Away
Kolokythokeftedes with Lemon Dill Greek Yogurt Dip: Football Foodie Fritters Away

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Over the last couple of seasons I’ve been making Seared Queso Blanco at home in place of mozzarella sticks, but this year has been all about the Greek kolokythokeftedes. Bright zucchini, salty feta, fresh bits of dill, parsley and mint come together and offer the right balance of crunch and soft chewy texture we crave in our football snacks. You can pair kolokythokeftedes with a tzatziki sauce if you like, but I prefer this pared down version of a lemon dill dip, the extra kick from the lemon zest pulling all the flavors together in sharp relief.

Slow Cooked Turkey Sandwiches with Spicy Remoulade Sauce: Football Foodie Sandwiches
Slow Cooked Turkey Sandwiches with Spicy Remoulade Sauce: Football Foodie Sandwiches

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One way to make a great turkey breast for sandwiches is by salting the meat like you would cure pork for bacon. The so-called “dry-brining” technique of prepping poultry is one of the easiest and most effective ways of making sure your turkey or chicken comes out succulent and moist. A method first popularized by Judy Rodgers at her Zuni Cafe in San Francisco, her salt rub style was featured in Cook’s Illustrated in the mid-aughts and it revolutionized the way home cooks prepared their holiday turkeys. No longer did people have to wrestle with giant pots of salted water taking up their entire refrigerators, the salt alone could redistribute the bird’s own natural juices while slightly changing the structural make-up of the meat so it would retain even more valuable water during cooking. (For the record, I was never a wet-brine fan. I would always make turkey with pounds of butter to keep it moist. With this method I don’t bother adding much fat, even when roasting a whole bird in the oven.)

And rather than worrying about constantly checking on a turkey in the oven on game day, why not just put everything in a slow cooker which is not only easier, it also ensures an extra juicy turkey. By going the extra yard of using a slow cooker which keeps all of the liquids in the pot instead cooking in a drying oven — good for crispy skin, bad for poultry — you get a firm, tender turkey without the typical dryness or mealiness.

Pizza Bloody Mary: Football Foodie Brunch
Pizza Bloody Mary: Football Foodie Brunch

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We’ve reached that awful point of the NFL season where there is an incredible imbalance on the Sunday schedule, a bunch of early games and then only two or three games with a 4 ET/1 PT kickoffs. This inequity drags on until after Thanksgiving, giving us plenty of weeks like this week where we only get Jets-Pats and Jaguars-Raiders with the late start, which means you need to be ready for brunch drinking to handle the massive onslaught of early games. (And by onslaught, I mean the Texans-Ravens matchup gets my vote for Sunday morning, but I wouldn’t object to watching Washington-Giants or Browns-Colts.)

Earlier this season I had a chance to talk with Holly Anderson over at SI’s Campus Union about tailgating and she asked what were my favorite football snack and drink to have during a game. My answer was that they’re the same thing, a Bloody Mary. I’ve written many times about how I love watching football on the West Coast because you wake up and it’s game time and brunch time, which makes the Bloody Mary a perfect match for the early games. It’s restorative and energizing, the perfect mix of booze and savory juice to perk you up. Add a large enough garnish and you’ve pretty much got a meal in a glass. What could make your liquid meal even better? Have it be inspired by one of the greatest football snacks of all time, pizza.

 Hot Bean and Chimichurri Dip, South American Choripans: Football Foodie Sauced
Hot Bean and Chimichurri Dip, South American Choripans: Football Foodie Sauced

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But what about that leftover chimichurri sauce? Well, it’s an excuse to make one of the greatest of South American sandwiches, a choripan.

 Hot Bean and Chimichurri Dip, South American Choripans: Football Foodie Sauced
Hot Bean and Chimichurri Dip, South American Choripans: Football Foodie Sauced

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A long day of football often calls for a hearty dip, especially if you don’t feel like mucking over a grill or with a fryer on a particular game day. This is an easy, filling baked bean dip that doesn’t require a lot of hands on time in the kitchen, leaving you plenty of time to wish you hadn’t benched that no-good crumb-bum Kenny Britt on your fantasy team. Adding chimichurri sauce to the beans not only brings a lot of extra flavor to the little legumes, it also works to thin out the mixture to make for easier chip scooping.

Deconstructed LA Street "Danger Dogs": Football Foodie Future at KSK
Deconstructed LA Street "Danger Dogs": Football Foodie Future at KSK

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The LA street dog — or “danger dogs” as locals like to call them — are found at the ubiquitous hot dog carts that pop-up outside of bars at closing time, after Staples Center, Rose Bowl, Coliseum and Hollywood Bowl events, and even just on random street corners with heavy pedestrian foot traffic. The name “danger” comes from in part, well, the danger. These bacon-wrapped hot dogs are cooked on giant steel cookie sheets along side onions, green peppers and jalapenos over hot coals or sterno in shopping carts. If you’re lucky, the person making the dogs have coolers for their hot dogs, bacon and mayonnaise, but don’t be surprised to see everything that is going onto the pan in a large bag just behind the cart.

Lemon-Chili Corn: Football Foodie Fall
Lemon-Chili Corn: Football Foodie Fall

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If you grew up in a Midwest/Mid-Atlantic household like mine, the only way had corn on the cob growing up was husked, boiled in water in the kitchen while everything else was on the grill and then served with about three pounds of butter and salt. (We had one neighbor who put out a separate stick of butter on the table for people to spin their cobs in at the table.) It’s nonsense, corn on the cob shouldn’t be about laboriously husking cold ears, scrubbing with a brush and then using up six gallons of water when there is a perfectly good fire going outside. Corn on the cob is easy, tasty and doesn’t need a lot of fat to make it taste delicious.

Roasted Garlic Cheese Spread: Fancy Football Foodie
Roasted Garlic Cheese Spread: Fancy Football Foodie

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Over the years I’ve found sometimes it’s good to have a snack that it a little more substantial than chips and dip between a big football brunch and the late-afternoon or evening football meal. Items that satiate small nagging hunger without spoiling your appetite later. Luxurious creamy French cheese infused with the flavors of roasted garlic, herbs and crisp white wine spread over crostini or crackers fit the bill perfectly, and if you’re watching the game with your in-laws, makes your game day feel a little classier than the usual canned-salsa-in-Velveeta routine.

Pasta Chips: Football Foodie Snacks
Pasta Chips: Football Foodie Snacks

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Sports can make you a nervous eater. Salt is good. Crunch is even better.

Unfortunately plain chips –  while delicious — don’t quite give the full emotional satisfaction of a hard crunch and aren’t filling enough to signal any sort of “stop you’ve had enough!” reaction until you’ve consumed the whole bag watching Peyton Manning being sacked for about the twentieth time. Season corned chips are better this way, but are covered with so much salt you don’t taste anything after about fifteen minutes and you may as well just go eat the rock salt in the garage. (Not that I’ve ever done that, but let me say that if you do try it, make sure it’s the plain rock salt and not the kind that has chemicals added to it for easier ice melting. Not that I’ve ever done that.)

This is why pasta chips are great for stressed sports eaters like myself.  They have a thick, hard crunch with heat from the red pepper flakes, depth from the thyme and rosemary, brightness from basil and just enough salt to balance out your drink.

 Bacon Chile Cheese Spinach Scrambled Eggs on Avocado and English Muffin Breakfast Sandwiches: Football Foodie Brunch
Bacon Chile Cheese Spinach Scrambled Eggs on Avocado and English Muffin Breakfast Sandwiches: Football Foodie Brunch

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A good, hearty breakfast sandwich serves two purposes, it gives you a good base of carbs and protein to start your day of yelling and screaming and it also helps eliminate any hangover you might have from either Friday or Saturday night to make sure you can actually spend a day yelling and screaming.

Creamy eggs, chewy English muffins, the mellow heat from the hatch chiles cooled by the creamy avocado, the hint of salty bacon and cheese with fresh spinach, these sandwiches are easily made for morning games at home or if you like, you can make the egg patties the night before and reheat in the morning in the oven or the microwave. And while I’ve never tried it, Dan over at The Sporkful told me he makes his egg patties the night before and heats them up on the grill for bagel sandwiches at Giants tailgates, so I’m sure his method works fine.

Candied Corned Beef Sandwiches
Candied Corned Beef Sandwiches

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Few things can match a nice, thick cut corned beef sandwich while having a beer and watching, well, anything. I’ve made this for just sitting around watching movies and it made the whole experience better. Baffled by the end of PROMETHEUS? The extra kick of pepper in this sandwich will forgive the awkward triple-ending. Vikings-Colts? Nothing but a little tender meat candied in molasses, mustard, brown sugar and ginger can’t fix, and hey, Andrew Luck pretty okay when not being let down by his offensive line. Dolphins-Raiders? Lord Hard Knocks help you, you’re definitely going to need this sandwich on Sunday (and probably a Mason jar full of Everclear).

Buffalo Chicken Pasta Salad: Football Foodie Kickoff
Buffalo Chicken Pasta Salad: Football Foodie Kickoff

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Every year I think to myself, “Self, how many different iterations of Buffalo chicken-X can there be? Surely you and the rest of the world of run out of ways to make Buffalo chicken? There are dips, there are wontons, there are pierogies, there are wraps. Sure, you have at least a dozen other hot-sauce-chicken-and-blue-cheese combinations still on the idea list, but do people still really want new ways to enjoy spicy chicken during football?”

Then I have to say back to myself, “Self, of course people still want other ways to make spicy chicken and cool dressing together! Buffalo chicken and football go together like Captain and Tennille, baseball and PEDs, Tony Romo and interceptions and Kevin Olgetree. The combination is timeless! Now why not post a recipe that combines buffalo chicken and a pasta salad so fans can have their favorite football food as a hearty pasta salad. Something with the spicy goodness, the pasta helping spread the blue cheese across the palate, the crunch of the celery and carrots rounding out the dish. Something you can make ahead of time and not worry about wing bones falling under your sofa.”

Haverly's Frijoles Borrachos (Drunken Beans): Football Foodie BEANS!
Haverly's Frijoles Borrachos (Drunken Beans): Football Foodie BEANS!

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The first in our 2012 BEANS! feature is this wonderfully thick, bean-forward recipe for Frijoles Borrachos (Drunken Beans) from Haverly. With pinto beans, garlic, onions, salt, bacon, tomato, beer and a little time, you get a hearty side that compliments grilled and barbecued items perfectly. Set these beans out with warm tortillas, sauteed vegetables, seasoned rice, pico de gallo, and some guacamole and you’ve got yourself a burrito bar. Like most bean recipes, this dish reheats beautifully so if you want to make them the night before a tailgate you can, just be sure to put the pot on the side of the grill with low heat and not the side of the grill you’ve got set to MEGA FLAMES for hot dogs in twenty seconds or less.

Cointreau Grilled Pound Cake with Strawberry Sauce: Football Foodie Kickoff
Cointreau Grilled Pound Cake with Strawberry Sauce: Football Foodie Kickoff

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There have only been a couple of desserts ever posted on the Football Foodie, Maker’s Mark Manhattan Mini Cupcakes and Chocolate-Peanut Butter Pretzel Cookies, not because we don’t like sweets (we do!), but because we so very rarely make them for football. However, after a week of grilling recipes, we’d be remiss not to include one of our favorite, easiest, fastest desserts you can toss over the fire, pound cake brushed with liqueur and topped with a fruit-liqueur sauce. Even if you’re tailgating, this is an easy dessert you can do before the game, just make the strawberry sauce the night before and chill before heading out.

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