Had this plan to live out a childhood dream today, chocolate milk on Count Chocula. Had nightmares about actually doing it last night.  – via Twitter (Obviously correcting my original misspelling of the word “Chocula.”)

Why am I still going through this?
I should go through with it. It’s been retweeted and I just saw an email saying Lisanti favored it.
That’s a horrible, horrible sense of esteem you have for yourself, Sarah. Maybe some chocolate will make you feel better.
Chocolate on chocolate better?
Chocolate on chocolate better.
Okay, but if I’m doing it, I’m measuring out the correct serving sizes and putting it in the calorie spreadsheet so I know how shitty to feel afterward. Plus, I’m a pound and half heavier this morning after a weekend of beer drinking and Halloween candy. Need to watch it this week. After this morning, nothing but watermelon and coffee for breakfast all week
3/4 cup cereal 100 calories, 1/2 cup chocolate milk 75 calories. That’s not too bad.
Use a ramekin to make make it look like a full bowl of cereal.
Oops, a few extra pieces of Count Chocula fell onto the counter. Let’s eat those.
Not bad. Tastes like powdered chocolate.
Should take a picture for the Tumblr.
Move the packets of Equal that went into the coffee out of the shot, no need for that sort of juxtaposition here. That’s just sad.
Here goes. Take a bite.
Why does this taste like plastic?
No, really. It tastes like plastic. Let’s take another quick bite and see if it still tastes like plastic.
Ugh, still like plastic. What have a done? This awful.
The two chocolates are fighting against each other. Is the Count Chocula winning this war with these dreadful marshmallows? How do two chocolates manage to taste like negative-five chocolate?
Calm down. Take a sip of coffee to cleanse the palate.
That’s nice. Much better. If anything, the chocolate on my tongue is making the coffee taste richer.
This is still pretty wretched. I had a bowl of Count Chocula last week and I don’t remember it being this bad. Was it this bad? Did I block it out?
Maybe it’s the milk.
It can’t be the milk. I love this TrueMoo chocolate milk. I was just telling Jeremy over the weekend how I’ve started buying more chocolate milk since finding out that TrueMoo tastes so good and uses real sugar and not HFC.
Why was I talking to Jeremy about chocolate milk? Did I tell him about this? Man, what a good friend to listen to me droning on about chocolate milk.
It’s getting better. Less plastic. The chocolate coating from the cereal is finally blending in with the chocolate milk. Too bad I only have about two bites left.
Wonder what Frankberry would be like with strawberry milk. Should have done that. Like strawberry milk more than chocolate milk anyway. Why was I so responsible when Bry was pointing out the Halloween cereal at Target and saying we could only buy one?
No, I was lying to myself. This isn’t getting better. If anything, it’s just making me sad that it tastes like the watery Ghost of Chocolates Past.
Should I drink the milk in the bottom of the bowl? This is all really, really awful tasting.
Drink the milk. Already counted the calories. May as well.
Oof. Yeah. The milk seems weird. How can be off? It’s been so rich when I’ve bought before. Did I buy skim by mistake? I never buy below 1% fat, it’s just too off tasting. Do they even make a skim TrueMoo chocolate milk? Did I buy skim before but it was better?
SHIT! This is skim milk! No wonder it doesn’t taste as creamy.
But wait, what did I buy before when the TrueMoo tasted better? Think!
Okay, at Gelson’s when I bought the chocolate milk with Bry, they were out of the quart size I usually get. And I said, “We don’t need to buy chocolate milk just for this.”
He replied, “Isn’t not a bad thing to have to drink through a half gallon of chocolate milk,” and grabbed the bigger carton.
They were double-faced across the top. Was one skim and one 1% or 2%? Shoot, I don’t remember. Did he ask me which one I wanted? Did I ask for skim, worrying about the calories? If I did, that was really dumb. This is terrible. It cannot be the same milk.
So I really haven’t fulfilled my dream of chocolate milk on Count Chocula. I could buy 1% or 2% chocolate milk when I run errands later.
Ugh, do I really want to do that? I mean, lesson learned. This was bad, but maybe I sabotaged it on purpose. Maybe you’re just not supposed to eat this crap.
Nightmares about it. Crappy, horrible nightmares where I even put the chocolate milk and the Count Chocula in a blender.
That’s ghastly.
And that was the pleasant part of the dream! Should have listened to my subconscious.
Well, maybe if there is some cereal left at the end of the week I can try again.
Maybe. Or maybe I can get a grip and realize this was a dream too good to be true.

Tumblr version.

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