Previously on Ladies…

In news that I think most people have ignored, (and yes I meant to cover this over the weekend but didn’t get a chance to), Tim Couch was released by the Jacksonville Jaguars before their second preseason game. He had been signed to a two-year deal by the Jags in July after his agent had shopped him to any team that would take a meeting, and went 2 for 4 with 2 sacks in the first preseason game. (Which sounds bad, but he has not played in an NFL game since he saw preseason action in 2005 with the Packers.)

It is easy to list Couch as yet another first-round draft pick busts, (he was taken ahead of Donovan McNabb if memory serves me right, but feel free to correct me), but he spent most of his career on his back with a Cleveland team that never provided him with any real protection.

At least he gets to find solace in the arms of his own Barker’s Beauty. (What is it with the Cleveland QBs and Playmates?)

Meanwhile, Old Man River Vinny Testaverde has finalized his one year deal with the Patriots and at 43 is going into his 21 season in the NFL, which is typically they type of career a kicker can expect, not a quarterback.

What is even more shocking is that Vinny has said on many occasions he expect to retire as a Jet, which means he thinks he has at least two more years of football let in him. (Or at least, two more years of carrying around a clipboard and being a good locker room presence.) I’ll always think of Vinny as the guy who was shouldered with being the QB that was around for the Browns move to Baltimore, and the guy that I couldn’t believe went to the Cowboys for a time. If he hadn’t been drafted by theBucs, I don’t think I could stand a single team he’s played on.

Speaking of the Pats, a player that most of the other Ladies love, Tom Brady, is concerned about having time off to be there when his baby is born. (The Bridget Moynahan one, we don’t know how he feels about the other one yet. Depends on how the team’s playoff hopes are looking I would imagine.)

Meanwhile over at Giants camp, Eli Manning has been having to listen to ex-Giant Tiki Barber mock his leadership and play calling ability in the press.

Hey Tiki, not to put too fine of a point on it, but you’re a broadcaster/analyst now. Show a little class and keep those opinions to y0urself until the cameras turn on.

 

 

Dear Ben,

See this? This is how you looked during most of the game on Saturday. That is when you were not scrambling all over, sliding in to get extra yards, and generally scaring the beejezus out of me. I might have even remarked during the game, “Dammit! How can I cover him completely in bubble wrap! DON’T GET HURT YET BEN!”

We all know that you’ve been really not shown much respect this preseason, but this is not the time to prove yourself to world. Not during August. Give it just a few more days. I know you can do it. We forgive you for last season, but will not be so kind if you hurt yourself now.

Love,

TSW

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13 Responses to Hit and Run – Wednesdays are for Quarterbacks

  1. Clare says:

    Once you figure out how to encase Big Ben in a protective covering, please let me know what you did. There’s a certain Phillie I’d like to swaddle in bubble wrap.

  2. Clare says:

    And not in a sexy way, either.

  3. If I didn’t think it would render him completely immobile, I would wrap him up Letterman style.

  4. Tuffy says:

    Could you find a similar technique for Rex Grossman that also wraps the ball inside? Thanks.

  5. bristlesage says:

    Yeah, I’m not sure why I feel like Couch’s sucking isn’t all his fault, but I certainly do. I don’t know; I guess I like the kid. When David Carr washes out I’ll feel the same way about him, I bet.

    On the other hand, every time I see a picture of Tom Brady I have to stop myself from flicking him in the face.

  6. What is it with Cleveland QBs and Playmates?

    Hey, if you need a beard, go for the best. Brady Quinn will ditch his HS sweetheart soon enough and get with the trend.

  7. chitowntiger says:

    TSW, thank you for NOT bringing up Sexy Rexy and his troubles in your look at QBs. With the way the media in Chicago is talking, you’d think that the Bears lost the game (they won) and that Grossman didn’t leave the game with the Bears in the lead (he did). I’m not saying he’s perfect, but geez!

    Thank you. Needed to get that off my chest.

  8. Bristlesage – That Carr comparison was the exact thing that came up while I was driving home with my friend J the other day.

    S2N – Too true. Was there anything better than Garcia’s girlfriends fighting in bars?

    Tuffy and Chitowntiger – Sexy Rexy is in no way Sexy or Rexy. Please explain.

  9. Yostal says:

    My attempts to secure my own Barker’s Beauty have been, to this point, unsuccessful.

    (And I just realized that joke is only funny when you know my last name…)

  10. chitowntiger says:

    I agree with you on his lack of sexiness. I don’t quite get it-I use the nickname because it’s easy. He is also my 5-year old nephew’s favorite football player because his name is easy to spell. That may up his… rexiness?

  11. Tuffy says:

    We can call him Flower if we want to.

  12. IJustMadeThatUp says:

    Well, since Tiki seems to be doing such a bang-up job with his way-too-early-no-matter-who-you-ask-retirement job, maybe we ought to think about bringing in Tim Couch to do some TV announcing?

    I think Ryan Seacrest will need a side-kick for The Emmy’s. And what schmoe is hosting the MTV Video Music Awards this year? Surely Tim is qualified for either of these demanding jobs.

  13. bristlesage says:

    Grossman looks as dumb as he plays. Probably his parents could see the dull eyes when he was born and realized he’d never get smarter than a five-year-old, chitowntiger.

    My husband is a Bears fan, and it’s a real irritant to watch their games with Stupidhands McSpaz at the helm. And when we switch to my team, it’s no better: I root for the Giants. GOD.

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